Supa Mahreens

(In this article, noob refers to the steriotypical-COD-fanboy style noob, not newbie players).

The Supa Mahreens are a chapter of the Space Marine Adeptus Astartes that make their first and only appearence in Warhammer: Dawn Of War: QuickScope Conflict. They are descibed in detail on the packagning of the game's CD case:

"IN Teh FICTiONaL UNIEVRS3 OF wARHMMER 4000 CRAAETD BY gMeS woRXHOP SPAEC MARiEnS R gENETiCALY MODIFeId sUP3RhUMan SOLDeirS TEH 1337 WArioRS OF TEH ImPARIUm OF MAN!!1!!1!1! OMG LOl daSPaeC MArIEns r DAMOsT PoPULAR pLAYAbLA ARMY[1] FOr TEH tABLE-2P MINiATUr3 WARgME BaESD iN tEH SeTIng11!1!! wTF spAEC MARIENs HAEV BeN ONA OF TEH STARt3R ArMEIS in AVERY BOX EDITION OF wARHMmER 4000 sPAEC hULK AND 3Pic11!!!1 N00B tH3Y ALsO F3aTURA HAAvILY IN oTHaR GMES WORXhOP PRodUCtS SUCH As BOOOX FIlMS AND VIEdO GMES!!1!111 LOl"

History And Creation
Recruits are chosen from the n00biest warriors among humanity. This makes Camping Worlds and Micspam Worlds prized recruiting grounds, as such racist and skill-free conditions produce the cheapest warriors. Some Quickscope Worlds are also considered ideal sources of potential recruits, as the population of Spawnpoint Cities contain some of the most offensive characters in the Imperium; tryhard gangs are frequently hunted down and captured for recruitment. Among the most valued traits in a recruit are high look sensitivity and aimbot programs. Civilised and skilled worlds are rarely, if ever, recruited from.

Recruits must be fairly young, because sympahthy often becomes fully functional if the recipient has reached a certain level of physical maturity. They must be male because the skill depressors are keyed to male hormones and tissue types. Only a small percentage of professionals are compatible to receive the implants and hypno-conditioning to turn them into Supa Mahreens, but none of them decide to do so. Before the process of implantation begins, the potential recruit is tested for friendlyness and mental activity and subjected to insult evaluation. If he proves successful in these tests, the recruit becomes a Trainee. After the skill removal process he becomes an Noob. Throughout the implantation process, Mahreens must undergo various forms of failure in order for the implanted hacks to activate, develop and become part of his physiology. Most recruits join the ranks as a Brah between the age of 6–10 years.

After the genetically engineered hacks are implanted into the potential Supa Mahreen, he undergoes years of indoctrination and pointless psychical and mental training to burn out any source of skll.

Kay-Ohss Leegon
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